To the Editor:
I grew up hearing that, as a Black American, you always had to be twice as good to get half as far. I worked feverishly to be three times as good — earning multiple scholarships to college and completing my doctorate by 28. Now, at 32, I’m an assistant professor of English and Endowed Professor of the Humanities at a small liberal arts college in Syracuse. Last weekend, I was sorely reminded that my accolades don’t shield me from race-based prejudice
I was racially profiled at a store.
From the moment I stepped through the door, I knew something was off. There were three older white women; two seemed quite pleasant, and one of them said “hi” as I pushed open the door. It was the third woman who stared at me blankly as I entered and moved to follow me toward the back of the store. I immediately sensed that she was suspicious of me.
So, like a good researcher, I tested my hypothesis. I roamed around every corner of that store, zigzagging back and forth, picking things up and then putting them down again. She followed. This went on for a while until I tired of the cat-and-mouse game.
After a nice conversation with one of the other women, I confessed that their colleague had made me feel uncomfortable. They apologized profusely, offering to speak with her. I figured, as a professor of Black literature and culture at Le Moyne College, I have all the tools and language to explain to this woman why her actions were harmful and wrong.
I bluntly asked my follower if she thought I was going to steal something. What followed was a tense conversation where she did not deny following me but instead doubled down. She told me, “you behaved strangely” and “You did laps,” to which I explained to her that I saw her following me from the moment I came in the door. I wanted to make sure I was right, so “I gave you something to follow,” I said.
The conversation was pointless. She would not cede any ground despite me telling her that her actions were racist. She had made assumptions about my intentions from just looking at me. She claimed she followed everyone; then claimed she was bored. I left in a hurry, telling the other two women I wouldn’t be purchasing anything.
I was and am still devastated by this experience. As I’ve probed my conscience, I realize it was this woman’s refusal to acknowledge wrongdoing or show remorse that was the most upsetting. I returned that same day demanding an apology. The other women again apologized. My follower proffered a halfhearted “I’m sorry.”
In a world of Trayvon Martins and George Floyds, biased assumptions Black criminality can end in Black death. My follower scared off a potential customer and violated my right to be treated fairly, like any other person.
Now, every time I pass by that store, I will remember that in 2023, in the blue state of New York, racism is alive and well. It is lurking right next door.
Norrell Edwards, Ph.D.
Syracuse
