DEAR MISS MANNERS: I need an objective opinion about a disagreement my boyfriend and I are having. For Christmas, he sent each of my kids (ages 14 and 11) a book as a gift. When we received them in the mail, I thanked him and praised him for his thoughtfulness.
Then, out of the blue, when he was visiting our home, he pulled me aside and said the kids needed to thank him for the books. Something bothered me about being put on the spot like that, but I knew it was true that they should thank him. So when he stepped out, I instructed my kids to tell him “thank you.”
Upon his return, my son obliged, but my daughter had gotten preoccupied with another activity and forgot. A few days later, when we were on the phone, he said, “Your daughter still hasn’t thanked me,” which I found to be kind of obnoxious at that point, although I held my tongue.
He went on to say he was appalled at her rudeness and would no longer be giving her gifts, to which I replied, “Fine -- if you’re going to be this way about it, please don’t.” He is now not speaking to me.
Was I in the wrong here?
GENTLE READER: Yes. And your daughter was, too.
(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
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